- When TikTok user Megan Boni sang about finding a “man in finance” with a “trust fund,” the world took notice.
- But marrying a Wall Street “finance bro” doesn't guarantee financial security, some experts say. In fact, it can even carry risks.
- If you are planning to get married, a prenuptial agreement can provide certain protections for both parties.
The financial fraternity is now taking notice.
Just ask about the content Creator Megan Boni posted a video of herself working on a new song on her account @girl_on_couch on April 30. The lyrics are simple: “I'm looking for a man who's in finance, who's in a trust fund, who's 6'5, blue eyes…” Her 20-second video has been viewed more than 38 million times and is still counting.
A representative for Boni did not immediately respond to CNBC's request for comment, but Boni recently told People magazine that the song was meant to poke fun at women who complain about being single but have high expectations for their future partners.
“I was just making fun of it,” she said.
“You can joke about things that you don't think are serious, but that's like joking about reproductive rights,” says Eve Lotsky, author of “Fair Play.”
“It boils down to a lack of understanding of our history,” Rodsky said.
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Still, there are plenty of reasons why the lyrics have resonated with millions of TikTok users.
“We've heard a lot about how terrible dating apps are and how dire the dating landscape is,” said Casey Lewis, a social media trends expert and founder of the trends newsletter After School.
“There are a lot of single women who are looking and just can't find what they want,” Lewis added.
“You lock a guy into finance and you're kind of successful.”
The search for wealthy “finance men” comes at a time when an increasing number of women are feeling frustrated and financially vulnerable.
“There's a sense that no matter how hard women work, they're barely making ends meet,” Lewis said.
Although women are becoming more educated and more often occupy senior positions in the workplace, they still earn less. According to an analysis of U.S. Census Bureau data by the National Women's Law Center, women earn just 84 cents for every dollar that men earn, a situation that has shown no significant signs of improvement for decades.
“There's this feeling that, 'If we can get the talent in finance, that's it,'” Lewis says.
“The finance person will likely look after you and give you a lot of good stuff, which is appealing,” she added.
A return to traditional gender roles
The idea of seeking out men in finance comes on the heels of TikTok's “tradwife” and “stay-at-home mom” trends, which also glamorize a return to very traditional gender roles and stereotypes.
But signing with a Wall Street-style firm doesn't guarantee financial security, Rodsky said. In fact, “you're taking on a lot of financial risk by entering into these types of deals.”
Once you cede power and your partner gains the upper hand financially, you're especially vulnerable, Rodsky explained. “Expectations often get misaligned,” Rodsky added. “So if you do get married, make sure you have a prenuptial agreement or a postnuptial agreement.”
“Prenuptial agreements can be very dangerous.”
If you are planning to get married, it is a good idea to determine how you and your spouse will each protect your assets and financial interests in case you end up going your separate ways.
And if it's “financial people with trust funds,” they and their families will have a greater interest in protecting the family fortune and the resources to make sure the agreement reflects that, said Heather Borneparth, an author and former corporate lawyer who now practices at Borne Fide Wealth, a New York City-based wealth management firm.
“This isn't malicious, this isn't them trying to scam you, it's just probably true,” Boneparth said.
Kelly Schwab, a family and matrimonial law attorney at Chemtob, Moss, Forman & Beida LLP in New York City, said hiring your own lawyer from another firm allows you to negotiate contracts and get your needs met without any conflicts of interest.
“This is not a joint venture. Prenuptial agreements can be very dangerous,” Schwab said.
If handled wisely, prenuptial agreements can provide some protection by incorporating certain guardrails, such as equalization clauses that require one spouse to pay a certain amount to the other in the event of divorce, said Julia Rogers, a family lawyer and co-founder and CEO of HelloPrenup, an online platform that offers affordable prenuptial agreements.
Overall, “you need to fully understand and be comfortable with what you're signing,” Bornparth said.
Marriage is also “an economic arrangement”
For better or worse, money plays a big role in most relationships.
“Marriage is both a love union and a financial arrangement,” says Stacey Francis, a certified financial planner and president and CEO of Francis Financial in New York.
Francis, who is also a member of the CNBC Council of Financial Advisors, said both partners should be involved in money decisions, regardless of who has more financial resources or earning capacity. “For women, it's about building financial confidence,” she said.
“When it comes to money, women need to be able to take care of themselves and not be 100% dependent on their man.”
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